Connecting

 

Eva Liang

Fall 2021 ESLINTG 100

 Lost in Translation Essay 2

October 1, 2021

Connecting

         Understanding two cultures can be challenging. When a family has two different cultures, it can be hard for everyone to understand each other. For example, in my family, Chinese culture vs. American culture, it feels like a battle between China and America. I am from China, and I am raising my kids in Chinese ways in the United States. This means that they are growing up with American culture but in my Chinese home. When they were no longer babies, they did not understand and accept my ways.  However, in China when I was going up, I had to respect my parents. Due to this situation, it has been difficult to communicate with my children.

         In China, eating meals together is more than just eating. Most people in my family sit at the same table and wait until everyone comes together.  The younger ones are supposed to serve the older ones, and only when the older people start eating then everybody can start.  While we are eating, everybody usually talks about their day. The grandparents sometimes tell a funny story, and everybody listens.  Sometimes, we laugh at our grandparents’ jokes, and it is a lot of fun.  We don’t do that in my family at Chicago.  Here, in my house, we usually eat buffet style. Everyone grabs their food and sits down to watch TV and eats by themselves.  We don’t talk that much in the United States, especially the children.  I think my parents’ stories are not interesting for them because of the language difference.  I miss the atmosphere of eating family meals in China.

         Moreover, my children’s tastes are different from mine.  Chinese food is very compared to American food.  When I grew up in China, I would always eat my mother’s home dishes.  For instance, my mother always made Hong Shao Rou (红烧肉)，Steamed Fish（清蒸鱼），Chopped Meat Pie（肉饼），Carrot and Soybean Soup（ 红萝卜黄豆汤）, and these are my favorite dishes.  I learned the same foods and served those meals to my children because I knew they are good for them. When they started to grow up and develop a more American taste, they stopped eating my cooking food that much.  Now I cook with a more American style into my foods to make it a Chinese American mixed meal to satisfy them.  I noticed that it is more difficult to make dinner for the family now.  Therefore, I have to learn to cook a variety of food for them.

All these changes mean that I need to learn to adapt to American culture myself.  I know I also must adapt to a new culture.  I have lived in the United States for nearly twenty years, so I cannot expect to keep all the old Chinese traditions.  For example, I know that in the United States, life moves faster than in China, so that is why sit-down family dinners are less common.  People have jobs to work, homework to do, groceries to buy, and people to see.  Therefore, I have tried to fit more into my children’s culture.  For example, it used to be hard to communicate with them because they learned English at school.  This year, I enrolled in English classes because I knew knowing English was important for our communication. I am working hard because I want to communicate with my kids better.  I also try to understand American culture better now.  I watch Netflix, shop at department stores, and sometimes even eat American fast food like McDonalds.  I do this to build up an American social circle so that I can understand my children’s lives better and have an easier time talking to other Americans.

It has been hard to communicate with my kids because of their American culture.  Nevertheless, I try to challenge myself. Constantly, I have to try the bitter things to experience the better things with my children. I have to force myself to learn a new culture in order to communicate with them.  Although sometimes I miss the past, I have to move on and bring myself into a new setting because my family is the most important part of my life. I believe we will understand each other someday!